again and again

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

i wanted to make an artsy entry today but sadly im in no mood.

random ramblings - (can be understood by some. hahaha.)

- maginhawa. yes, there are some things better left unsaid and untold but now we resolve to never to talk about it again. it could have ruined the whole night and it almost did. haha. that was being honest.

- sports camp. its great to talk. in front of mr. poon, seeing sweaty players go by, it isnt the perfect atmosphere, but i've resolved to make it better. without the chains, without the bars. one more shot. (not what you think this may be. haha.)

- strangers. beauty of the unknown, keeps you guessing. well, we all would never know if someone you can't see can be matino or not. i've been watching this anime show recently and there's this one person who's blind and apparently uses the "eye of the heart". that should be connected somewhere.

- banez. haha. damn, this is too obvious. an overuse of the word "mainam"

- ababu. ox brain. kobideh. dammmit. it was good seeing you again. and apparently naunahan mo pa kami. when the world always thought you had none, damn, they were wrong. haha. we're just happy for you.

- emohan. yes, seeing the two of them made me real sad and again could've ruined that same night. and at the same time, maybe that's why my night wasn't ruined. seeing what happened to you guys, maybe, and maybe, this all isn't a losing battle.

- EBZ represent yo. FLG. dubious chemistry. the nights have been all too fun. and yeah, as much as i'm not showing it, it's been great.

- i pinoy. haha. apparently living up to the name, and should we be proud? are we? and all that talk about dirt and such. its been funny and intriguing. riight?

- insomia galore. from sleeping for 14 hours to not sleeping at all for the past 3 days and counting. i just need to sleep now. but no. not yet. don't underestimate an underdog.

- my somehwat exact-mirror double. to believe that we can change the world, to come back despite the world pulling us to the other side. to know that we can do it. going home seeing the sun goes up might not be appealing, but, to be willing to be there waiting at home. giving in? the shadows of the old world have already been gobbled up by the rainbow of the new generation. to compromise. what do we do?

- paano kita iibigin. literally and figuratively. period. (oh wait, im actually implying nothing here, the movie opens tomorrow, oh i mean today, by the way)

- summer predictions. it has been a blast. in more ways than we could actually think of it. there's about three weeks left and we're all almost there. and we need to reach there soon. don't we?

- dream-eater. waking up finding the sky gloomy is not a good feeling. nor is it great to know that you have missed a particular eating time. where is it all pointing to? the phone conversations and the valley steps. they don't seem blurry as they are supposed to be. i can give my guess, but it has always been the opposite. and you said maybe not this time around.

- limbo. (babartil will understand this) to have both sides of the world conspire against you and you are down to your feet crawling to the direction of your preferred choice. where do you go? to a place full screams and bexations (natawa ako for a moment) of the other side or to the other side were all is silent, calm and subdued. you look at both sides and all the thick air is confusing you. at the moment you are not a stable rationale. and the solution's quite easy actually, you never have to look at both sides, just look at yourself first.

- to teng. flirting. bad job at doing it? yeah. haha. we lie at two extremes right now but in the middle it all comes down to the same thing. that one statement. you know what this is. paggising sa isang mahilamuyak na umaga sa kung saan napakadaming bulaklak na maaaring amuyin at pitasin.

that was more than what i expected. now leaving with a haiku.

(untitled)

blink blink goes the light.
a tiny speck illumines
the room, alone, still.

jau imagined at 1:55 AM

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